A man died. He had lived a bad life, so he went to Hell. Upon arrival, he went through orientation with a minion. At the end of orientation, the minion explained that there were three doors, and that the man could choose which fate would be his for all eternity.

Door number one was opened, and the man saw people in agony, being boiled in oil. “No thanks,” he said.

Door number two was opened, and he saw people having their skin peeled from their bodies. “Ouch! No thanks,” he said.

Behind door number three, he saw people standing in excrement, up to their knees, sipping coffee and tea. “Well, that looks pretty unpleasant, but it is much better than the other choices. I’ll take door number three.”

“Are you sure?” asked the minion.

“Yes,” replied the man.

So the minion shoved him through the door and slammed the door behind him. Just then, the man heard the public address system announce, “OK. Coffee break is over. Back on your heads.”